In one recent discussion, what arose was the stark difference between the experience of having sex and of making love, and what that means to us as men. The men in question were able to discern the difference between the two experiences and each man was at their own unique stage of the path towards making love rather than having sex, discarding sexual energy and allowing for a deeper connection to form in their lovemaking. What was shared was very special — that each man felt drawn towards making life about love. Some of the aspects that were discussed: It was considered that having sex is a form of relief, a solitary act with a beginning and an end, often leaving uncomfortable feelings for men post-coital and a desire to vacate the scene, whether physically or otherwise. One man shared how his partner called him out for seeking relief by asking for intercourse. Being honest about this, he was able to admit that he had been seeking relief — it was a beautiful thing to be that honest and not go into rejection.
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